Easy Rider
Season 5, episode 13
Easy rider
Air date December 3, 1991
Writer(s) Jeff Schimmel
Director Joel Zwick
Previous Bachelor of the Month
Next Sisters in Crime

Easy Rider is episode thirteen of season five on Full House. It originally aired on December 3, 1991.

Opening Teaser

Joey and the girls are playing baseball in the backyard; with Joey batting, Stephanie pitching, D.J. as the catcher, and Michelle as the umpire. (See #Quotes and #Gallery).


The episode starts with Danny taking care of the garden outside, and he's actually spraying the leaves and wiping them clean. When Joey sees this, he's surprised (see Quotes).

After enduring some teasing from the neighborhood kids, Michelle comes home from her bike ride and is not a happy camper. She is determined to learn how to ride her bicycle without its training wheels (the cause of the teasing), and Joey volunteers to teach her.

In the living room, while munching on a bowl of popcorn, D.J. and Stephanie are watching music videos until they find one that D.J. does not like, and neither of them has the courage to change the channel or even pick up the remote (which is on top of the TV). Danny sees them, turns off the TV, and gets them out of the room as he needs to work with Vicky. They "ooh!" about this, but he assures them that there is nothing to "ooh!" about. They think that he is chicken about Vicky and the date (Stephanie clucking to prove this). They "ooh!" again, but he tells them there is nothing about them that they have in common. As the girls leave, Danny begins to get intimate with Vicky after having a lot of trouble maintaining a strictly-business relationship with her. They try to keep their relationship strictly professional, but it is almost impossible when kissing is really the only thing on their minds.

At the park, Michelle is all geared and ready to go for her first lesson without the training wheels. She has the usual safety equipment, from pads to goggles to helmet. She says that the pads are keeping her from moving, but Joey tells her the classic proverb of "better safe than sorry".

However, the lesson doesn't go well. As soon as he lets go, she crashes into a bush and gets a scrape on her hand. So, she tells him that she does not trust him anymore. Back home, not even a Bullwinkle impression from him can convince her to keep learning.

Meanwhile, Becky and Jesse take Nicky and Alex on their first car trip to visit Becky's aunt Ida, and they end up taking almost everything in the boys' bedroom with them.

In the backyard, Michelle decides to sell her bike as a sign of her giving up. Apparently, D.J. and Stephanie try to convince her not to do so, and even also try to help teach, but their attempts fail as well when she shows them the scrape she got.

Even though Michelle has already hurt herself with a scrape, Joey encourages Michelle to continue to learn how to ride her bike and he convinces her to trust him no matter what. He tempts her with her own VHS copy of The Little Mermaid (her favorite movie), but that does not help at all. He eventually advises her that she has to learn how to ride her bicycle, not only without training wheels but without a grown-up at her back. He reminds her (as the inspirational music plays) that riding a bike is hard work, and while she may have fallen and crashed into the bush on her first try, she has to get back up and keep going until she gets it right so that she will not fall or crash into something again. She finally decides to trust him, and they hug and kiss (just as the music stops).

The second time around is more successful, and he does not let go until she says he can, to which she continues riding safely (as the EP credits appear).


[The opening teaser:]
Joey: Joltin' Joey Gladstone is at the plate. Stephanie Tanner, the crafty right-hander, is on the mound. The windup, the (3-2) pitch.
[Stephanie pitches, and the ball lands in D.J.'s hands.]
Joey: What?! That ball was outside by a mile! Ball four. [They get in each other's faces and an argument ensues.]
Michelle: It was a strike!
Joey: It was a ball!
Michelle: It was a strike!
Joey: It was a ball!
Michelle: It was a strike!
Joey: It was a strike!
Michelle: It was a ball!
Joey: Oh, so it was a ball. Thank you very much.
Michelle: Hey, you tricked me! You're outta the game!
Joey: What?!
D.J.: You heard the ump. You're outta here.
Stephanie: Yeah, hit the showers!
Michelle: And wash behind your ears!
Joey: Alright, fine. I'm outta the game. I'm taking my bat and ball and I'm goin' home. [He's about to do so, when suddenly...]
Michelle: Hold it! You're back in the game! Play ball!
Joey: Play ball.
[He successfully hits Stephanie's next pitch.]

[Michelle comes home from riding her bike.]
Joey: Hey, biker babe. How's it goin'?
Michelle: [angrily] Not good. Some boy said to me [in a sing-song voice], 'Baby baby, stick your head in gravy.'
Joey: Well Michelle, if he said that, then he's the baby. Next time, you just be a big girl and say [sing-song again]: 'So? So? Suck your toe all the way to Mexico.'
Danny: You're a wonderful role model.
Joey: Well, at least I don't simonize my plants.

Joey: Michelle, I'm sorry you fell off your bike. ... Okay, if you won't talk to Joey, [changing voices] will you talk to your old pal Bullwinkle?
Michelle: Okay. Tell Joey I'm very mad at him!
Joey: [Bullwinkle voice] Joey, Michelle is very mad at you. [normal voice] Maybe you could tell her that it was just an accident and I love her like crazy? [Bullwinkle voice] Maybe she won't believe you. [normal voice] She will. [switching between voices each time:] She won't. She will. She won't. She will. I saw a smile.
Michelle: Oops.
Joey: Nope too late. I already saw you smiling.
Michelle: Only because you were funny.
Joey: Well, that's a start. Can I fix that scrape for you?
Michelle: Can Bullwinkle do it?
Joey: [Bullwinkle voice] Why, certainly. Dr. Bullwinkle T. Moose at your service. Just have a seat in my office. [opens the drawer and gets out the first aid kit] Okay, here we go. Now, sit tight for a moment.[gets the antiseptic spray] Now, this may sting a little [sprays it on her scrape].
Michelle: Ouch! That stings a lot!
Joey: I'm sorry.
Michelle: You lied again. Now, I really don't trust you [starts to leave].
Joey: It wasn't me. It was Bullwinkle.
Michelle: Oh, sure. Blame it on the moose.

[Michelle is in the backyard by her bike as her sisters come out of the house.]
Michelle: Anybody wanna buy a bike? It's only 50¢.
D.J.: No, thanks. Hey, Joey told us you fell off your bike. So why don't we get one last shot [with the camcorder that Stephanie is holding] of you sitting on the bike that you're never gonna ride again?
Michelle: What is this, a trick?
Stephanie: Michelle, bubby (see Oh Where, Oh Where Has My Little Girl Gone?#Trivia), baby. If we wanted to trick you, we'd do something a little more clever than asking you to sit on your bike.

Joey: Michelle, I'm sorry you had an accident, but I had to let go. That's how you learn. Otherwise, every kid you'd see learning how to ride their bike would have a grown-up hanging on the back.
Michelle: Well, it's better than falling into a bush!


The episode title is taken from the title of the 1969 Oscar Award-nominated film Easy Rider.


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