|Season 3, episode 23|
|Air date||April 27, 1990|
|Writer(s)||Tony DiMarco & David Ketchum|
|Previous||Three Men and Another Baby|
|Next||Our Very First Telethon|
In his room, Jesse is busy strumming away at his guitar, when Michelle enters, wanting to play a game with him. He decides to play his "laughing game", where one has to make the other laugh (she has to make him laugh, he has to make her laugh, and vice versa) and whoever laughs first loses. They then play another game where they make hideous faces at each other, and he's able to replicate the one where she sticks her tongue out while grasping both sides of her lip.
Joey and Danny remember that the fraternity burned Danny's fraternity sweater when Danny messed up and unintentionally allowed a sorority, Lambda Tau Delta, to steal a stuffed seal that was Chi Sigma Sigma's mascot. The Lambda Tau Delta girls had tackled Danny to the ground and taken the seal. Since the Lambda Tau Delta girls are also having a reunion, Joey and Danny see an opportunity to get the seal back from them.
When D.J. and Kimmy Gibbler take the TV upstairs, they accidentally break it (as shown at right). After Danny hears it, comes in and sees it, he tells Kimmy to leave. After she leaves, Danny tells D.J. not to see her for three weeks. And before he sends her up to her room, Stephanie is behind him, making hand motions.
Later, Danny and Joey head off to the reunion while D.J. stays home to watch Stephanie and Michelle. The two older girls play the cup game (see Quotes & Trivia), and Michelle is anxious to learn it. However, even after explaining how it works (see Quotes), D.J. decides that it is too complex and too complicated for Michelle to learn, so she decides to teach her something simpler instead, such as the patty-cake rhyme.
In their attempt to get the seal back, Danny and Joey disguise themselves as women so they can get in to take the seal. However, their attempt fails, and when Joey's wig falls off during a game of limbo, the jig is up. The gaffe is taken advantage of and they are put in jail by a former Lambda Tau Delta member who is now a cop, who actually cuffed Joey's left hand to Danny's right.
Back home, while she is teaching "patty-cake" to Michelle as she promised (via a pinky swear), D.J. gets a phone call from Danny at the jail, and tells her to send either Becky or his mother Claire to bail them out. But D.J. can't find either, so she gets Kimmy to come over to babysit her sisters while she heads to the Powell Street jail, and hears that the Lambda Tau Delta girls have voted to release Danny and Joey. While they both wait, the prisoners entertain them (see Trivia), which elicits applause from both guys (and the audience).
At home, Danny is grateful to Kimmy for coming over to babysit and teach Michelle "patty-cake" while D.J. was gone (which elicits audience applause), so he takes a week off of her banishment from the house. Of course, they're all surprised at his and Joey's return (see Quotes). The guys talk about the night's events, and even look at themselves in the mirror and laugh at themselves. Danny even remarks that Joey could be his equivalent to Kimmy.
Later that night, with both guys back in normal clothing, Jesse comes home from a bike ride in the woods and is not a happy camper, and he means that literally. He rode his bike into a swamp after he was spooked by a snake (or a snake-like twig, as he said). Then, he notices the pearl earring in Danny's ear, a sign of the night's events. He decides to go wash up (per Danny), saying that he has had a strange day (as Jeff Franklin's EP credit appears), though Danny's and Joey's may have been even stranger. And he heads off to do just that (as Thomas L. Miller and Robert L. Boyett's EP credits appear and the audience applauds).
- Danny & Joey: [singing] We are Chi Sigma Sigma. Chi Sigma Squared. We are Chi Sigma Sigma so girls be prepared. Ooga-chagga ooga-chagga ooga-chagga ooh!
- Joey: [to Danny]: It's up to you. Do you want to be fraternity dud or fraternity stud?
- Stephanie: [after Danny catches her making hand movements while he disciplines D.J.] Well, I guess we told her.
In the kitchen, D.J. and Stephanie do the cup game as Michelle watches.
- Michelle: How do you do that?
- D.J.: Well, you go: [starts counting out the taps while demonstrating slowly] clap, clap, 1-2-3, clap, 1...[stops] Why don't I teach you patty-cake instead?
- Michelle: Okay. I hope it's fun.
- Danny: [comes downstairs] D.J., shouldn't you be getting dinner ready?
- D.J.: Oh, right now, Dad. [to Michelle] I'll teach you patty-cake later.
- Michelle: Pinky swear?
- D.J.: Pinky swear. [And they do it.]
Joey, dressed in drag, attempts to join in on limbo.
- Joey: [falsetto] How low can I go? I'm a limbo bimbo! [...but his wig falls off]
- Mary Ann: This bimbo is a man!
- Joey: Oh, thank goodness! I don't have to live this lie another minute! [to Danny] Grab the... [normal voice] Grab the seal!
- Danny: [after getting handcuffed] Hey, this isn't funny.
- Mary Ann: It's not supposed to be. I'm a police officer and you're both under arrest for attempted burglary.
- Waiter: [to Danny, swiping away his card] You tease!
In the living room, D.J. is teaching patty-cake to Michelle.
- D.J.: OK, here's how you play patty-cake. [She demonstrates, but a phone call interrupts them.] Hold on.
- Michelle: Aw, nuts.
- Prisoner: [to Danny]: Danny? I think I know you. Aren't you Danny Tanner?
- Danny: That depends. Does that make you happy or sad?
- Prisoner: You're the host of Wake Up, San Francisco. I love that show! You have a big following in prison!
- Danny: Really? Did you happen to catch my segment on Southwestern cooking last week?
- Prisoner: Loved it!
- Danny: Y'know, it's interesting, 'cause we don't like to make simulated cooking stuff. We really cook it on the stove.
Kimmy comes over, despite Danny's earlier warning.
- Kimmy: Your dad's in the slammer?!
- D.J.: Shh...!
- Kimmy: What did he do, dust-bust a cop?
- D.J.: I don't know what he did, but I can't find Grandma or Becky, so I have to go down myself and bail him and Joey out.
- Stephanie: Kimmy, you're not allowed in this house for three weeks.
- Michelle: [wagging her right finger] You're in big trouble, mister!
- D.J.: It's okay. I have to go out, so Kimmy's gonna watch you.
- Stephanie: Wouldn't we stand a better chance taking care of ourselves?
- D.J.: Look, I just have to run an errand. [horn honks] That's my cab. Don't worry, Steph. Everything will be fine.
- Michelle: What about my patty-cake?
- D.J.: I'll teach you patty-cake later.
- Michelle: Aw, nuts again.
- [D.J. exits.]
- Stephanie: [seriously] What's wrong?
- Kimmy: Never fear, Gibbler's here!
- Stephanie: Oh, I feel much better now [rolling her eyes].
D.J. has arrived at the police station to pick up her dad and Joey.
- D.J.: Um, excuse me... I'm looking for Danny Tanner.
- Officer: [pointing towards the cell] Uh... blue dress. [As she turns in that direction, the guys sheepishly wave at her.]
- D.J.: Dad! Joey! What did they do to you?!
- Danny: Sad part is, we did this to ourselves. D.J., what are you doing here?
- D.J.: Well, Grandma and Becky weren't home, so I had to come down myself. But don't worry about Stephanie and Michelle; Kimmy's watching them.
- Danny: [sarcastically] Yeah, this night keeps getting better and better.
- Mary Ann: Tanner, Gladstone. The sorority girls and I took a vote: We've humiliated you guys long enough. We're dropping the charges.
- Joey: Oh, thank you! [hugging Danny] Danny, we're free!
- Danny: Never, ever hug me when I'm in prison.
- Kimmy & Michelle: Patty-cake, patty-cake, baker's man. Bake me a cake as fast as you can. Roll it, and pat it, and mark it with a "B"; then put it in the oven for you and me.
- Danny: [arriving with D.J. and Joey] We're back.
- [All three girls' mouths drop wide open.]
- Michelle: Daddy's a girl!
- Stephanie: No... He's a woman.
- Kimmy: An ugly woman.
- Danny: I guess you girls are wondering why we're wearing these clothes. Well, I can explain it all in just four words: It's all Joey's fault! So is everything okay here?
- Michelle: Kimmy taught me patty-cake.
- Stephanie: She's really an excellent babysitter.
- Danny: Well, I'm really happy and incredibly shocked to hear that. You girls should go to bed.
- Stephanie: [hugging her babysitter] Good night, Kimmy.
- Kimmy: Good night, Steph.
- Stephanie: Come on, Michelle. [takes her sister by the hand, but then stops] I just hugged Kimmy Gibbler. Dad and Joey are in dresses.
- Michelle: What a day! [They exit.]
- Danny: Jesse, were you attacked by a wild animal?
- Jesse: No. I got thrown off my bike. It got spooked by a snake. Well, actually, it was a snake-like twig.
- Danny: Look, why don't you go get upstairs, take a bath.
- Jesse: Danny?
- Danny: Yeah?
- Jesse: Is that a pearl earring you're wearing? [pauses] Is there anything you'd like to talk to me about?
- Danny: You don't want to know.
- Jesse: Oh, well. I'm going to go wash up. I've had kind of a strange day. Although yours might have been stranger.
- The last episode in which Lori Loughlin is not credited for the role of Rebecca
- The "cup game", that Stephanie and D.J. play, and D.J. was about to teach Michelle, is recently known for being used with the song "When I'm Gone", popularized by singer-actress Anna Kendrick, in the 2012 movie Pitch Perfect
- The prisoners entertain Danny and Joey with the song "New York, New York"