|Road to Tokyo|
|Season 6, episode 3|
|Air date||October 6, 1992|
|Previous||The Long Goodbye|
As Stephanie lies on her bed reading a magazine, Michelle gives Nicky and Alex any and all toys she no longer plays with. Unfortunately, the big sis notices all the toys her roommate's giving away are all broken, and asks her to give them toys that are not broken. Michelle says that babies (which they no longer are) will play with anything, and that makes Stephanie give Michelle her old watch, sans the hour hand. But that goes straight to the twins as well, as Stephanie says, "Christmas shopping for these three should be easy."
Fat Fish Records calls Jesse, and tells him that "Forever" has reached #1 in Japan, and they want him to travel there for two weeks. He takes the offer and his family with him, so Becky asks Danny to cover for her on Wake Up, San Francisco.
Meanwhile, Kimmy Gibbler has been nominated for class president by the "Party Hearty Party", but her campaign speech really is not a speech at all (see Quotes)! For the school newspaper, D.J. writes an editorial about the election, and she is afraid it will damage her best friend's chances of being elected. But in the end, Kimmy emerges victorious.
Also, Danny and Joey begin arguing over the stupidest and most inconsequential of details.
The ensuing adulation and the upcoming tour would inflate anyone's ego – and Jesse, alas, is no exception. Once he and his family get to Japan, he starts letting his "road to Tokyo" go to his head, and thus, starts ignoring his family, the real top priority. When Becky tries to bring him back to his senses, he accuses her of trying to mess up his dream of succeeding in the music business (similar to accusing his dad of such in "It's Not My Job"), thus causing her to walk out. When she returns and the inspirational music plays (and the audience gives an "aw" for their reconciliation), she tells him that she does want his dream to come true, but does not want him to forget about his family, and he realizes that she is right. She gives her goofy old husband a kiss (just as the music stops and the audience gives a "WHOO!"). He gives Koji, the manager, some time off, as well as himself so he can ponder his next move.
Back at home, Michelle is convinced that she can "reconnect" with Jesse by digging a hole to Japan, and she is elated when Jesse gets home, not knowing he's already home (see Quotes). He gives his "little Munchkin" a kiss (as the audience gives an "aw"), and decides that he would be better raising the twins at home in the good old U.S. of A. They join the rest of the family in enjoying some rocky road ice cream (as the audience applauds and the EP credits appear).
[Joey enters the backdoor carrying bags of groceries.]
Joey: Hey, Danny, give me a hand with these, would you?
Danny: Sure... Joey, why did you buy these? Nobody likes Brussels sprouts.
Joey: I felt sorry for them – sitting alone on the shelf, watching everyone go for the carrots and the corn...
Danny: You know that they're vegetables. They don't have feelings like you and me.
Joey: How do you know? Have you ever been a Brussels sprout?
Danny: You love this, don't you? You're deliberately starting an argument with me just to drive me crazy.
Joey: And I did.
Danny: No, you didn't.
Joey: Yes, I did.
Danny: And you're not gonna do it again.
Joey: I just did.
Danny: No, you didn't.
Joey: Yes, I did.
[Kimmy has an idea for her campaign.]
Kimmy: Here's my campaign speech: [pops open a black umbrella with a hypno-spiral and starts rotating it] 'You will vote for Gibbler. You will vote for Gibbler.'
Danny: Kimmy, do you really think that'll work on anyone with half a brain?
Joey: [as the camera zooms in on his wide-eyed face and he hypnotically walks out of the kitchen and into the living room] I will vote for Gibbler. I will vote for Gibbler. I will vote for Gibbler.
[The kitchen phone rings, and Stephanie and Michelle dash into the kitchen (the latter coming downstairs) to get it.]
Michelle: My turn, my turn!
Stephanie: I got it, I got it, I got it!
Michelle: [beating her sister] You got it the last time. [answering the phone] Tanner residence. [listening to the recipient] I'll see if he's in. Uncle Jesse! [back to the phone call] Who's calling, please?
Stephanie: Dad, that could've been Randy Richardson, the second-cutest boy in my whole class. Of course, he's also the third-dumbest, but overall it kinda works. [She heads upstairs.]
[Upstairs in their room, Stephanie's doing her homework, while Michelle plays with her dollhouse. Suddenly, the phone rings and they make a mad dash for it, but Stephanie is the first to pick it up.]
Stephanie: Please be Randy. Hello? No, this isn't Mario's. Why would you want a pizza with pineapple? How rude! [She hangs up.] That doesn't count, Michelle. I get the next one.
Michelle: No! The next one can be Uncle Jesse. Why doesn't he call us?
Stephanie: He's in Japan, Michelle. He's probably busy.
Michelle: How far is Japan?
Stephanie: Far, Michelle. Thousands and thousands of miles.
Michelle: How far is a mile?
Stephanie: 5,280 feet.
Michelle: Wow, that's a lot of feet. How many toes is it?
Stephanie: [reaching her boiling point] Michelle, Japan is on the other side of the world.
Michelle: [sarcastically] Well, then how am I gonna get there?
Stephanie: [sarcastically herself] I don't care! Dig a hole and come out on the other side.
Michelle: Oh! Thank you. Now, was that so hard?
Kimmy: We did it! [She gives her best friend a big hug.] It was a Gibbler landslide. The 'Hearty Party Gibblercrats' have spoken.
Steve: Congratulations, Kimmy.
Kimmy: Thanks. So, what about my campaign promise?
Steve: Look, on behalf of the wrestling team, we don't do mud. [He kisses his girlfriend, and leaves.]
Kimmy: [as he leaves] Steve, wait! What about hot oil? Jell-O? Guacamole? [She follows him out.]
Becky: [to the media in Jesse's dressing room] Excuse me! Excuse me! [But when they ignore her – because they don't understand – she starts speaking Japanese to get them to leave.]
Jesse: [with a surprised look on his face] Becky, what's gotten into you?! And when did you learn to yell in Japanese?!
Becky: I've had a lot of time on my hands.
Jesse: That was the press you just kicked out of here.
Becky: Jesse, I don't care! You just agreed to tour a whole year without so much as asking me what I thought!
Jesse: Oh, we'll have some fun, just like we've been having.
Becky: Oh yeah, Jess. It's been a blast: eating without you, sightseeing without you, kissing the boys good night without you. ... Yesterday, Nicky called the limo driver 'Daddy-san'.
Jesse: Well, we do have a similar hair thing going on. [...] [to Koji] I'm a jerk. ... I let this whole thing go to my head, and I also let the most important person in my life walk out the door.
Koji: OK... You're a jerk.
Koji: Bigger jerk!
Koji: Major jerk!
Jesse: OK, I get it!
[In the backyard, Michelle is with Comet digging a hole to Japan.]
Michelle: Boy, Comet. It's taking forever to get to Japan. Why don't you dig for a while? [And he does so, when suddenly, emerging from the back door...]
Jesse: [in a deep voice] Hey, Shorty.
Michelle: Oh, we're getting closer. I'm coming, Uncle Jesse! Stay right there!
Jesse: [normal voice] Hey, Comet, take five! [...] Becky and I asked ourselves a question: where's the best place to raise Nicky and Alex?
Michelle: Right here.
Jesse: And who's the greatest Munchkin cousin they could ever have?
Michelle: That'd be me!
Jesse: You are correct, sir! And who is the greatest ice-cream-eating partner of all time?
Michelle: That's me again!
Jesse: You're on a roll!
Michelle: This is unbelievable.
Jesse: [kisses her] Come on, let's go hit that rocky road [ice cream], huh [as they go inside]?
Michelle: I'm glad you're home, Uncle Jesse.
Jesse: So am I.
- The opening teaser cue is one used in seasons 2–5
- After the theme, as the episode opens, it shows Danny and Stephanie riding the bike like in the season one opening
- The last known episode to feature Stephanie's "How rude!" catchphrase (until Fuller House)
- Tom Amundsen's name oddly comes up first in the co-producers list instead of Jay Abramowitz's in the closing credits (as co-producers are usually listed in alphabetical order)
- The subplot of Kimmy being nominated as class president and D.J. writing an editorial about it was likely planned due to the 1992 Presidential Election